My partner is less enthusiastic about community living than I am. What should we do?

K Answered by Kibutz

This is very common, and it’s worth taking seriously — a community where one partner is unhappy rarely works for either of you.

• Separate the idea from the details. Often the hesitation is about something specific: privacy, money, the children’s schools, a particular group. Ask what exactly worries them.
• Each take the Community compass separately, then compare. You may agree on more than you think — or discover the real gap.
• Visit together — and let your partner ask their own questions.
• Look at models with more privacy. Cohousing gives every household a full private home. For many hesitant partners, that changes everything.

If your partner’s answer is still no, that’s information too. Better to know before buying land.